Surviving and Thriving During a Collective Crisis

"When everything is moving and shifting, the only way to counteract chaos is stillness. When things feel extraordinary, strive for ordinary. When the surface is wavy, dive deeper for quieter waters." --Kristin Armstrong (most decorated women cyclist in US history)

These are extraordinary times we are living in:  calamitous, turbulent, and nerve-wracking.  We have been forced to engage like we never have before.  We witness the extraordinary power of democracy in action and the often terrifying forces challenging democracy.  It has our adrenals and central nervous system working on overdrive.  I am hearing and seeing the bouts of crippling exhaustion and despair from many.  How can we survive and thrive during this crisis, especially if it is long and drawn out, as it appears it will be.

In my experience, the single most important quality necessary is self discipline.  Without this, it is very easy to be pulled off our center of gravity, to lose focus, to become physically or emotionally disabled. These are the days when routine and purposeful activity is mandatory, healthy outer and inner habits leaned upon. 

What does this mean in relation to the 4 fundamentals of wellness: rest, nutrition, exercise and spirit work/play?

REST:  Make sure you get a lot of it.  Try to go bed nightly the same time and wake the same time.  If your sleep is broken, start employing self-care tactics to ensure a better night's rest.  

Sleep is the most obvious aspect of the rest fundamental.  But to give our sympathetic nervous system periodic breaks we should be having other relaxing actions as part of our day.  Needlecraft's like knitting, crocheting is a great relaxer, helping get repetitive deeper breathing patterns in play.  Playing an instrument, playing record/CD, radio music, watching funny or non-intense movies, reading novels.  Know where your threshold is with stress and anxiety and take a break.  Take a whole day off from social media or political activities and just have some guilt free fun. In a crisis, it's very important to have a lapse of engagement, where you are not thinking or acting on behalf of the crisis.  And in that lapse, to feel joyous in the activity and not guilty you are not "on it".  Pick your battles, you can't be part of every march and rally.  Know what is the right action and when for you. Become aware of fatigue, burn out, depression and readjust your approach.  Navigating this terrain for ourselves is very interesting as you begin to recognize signs and symptoms in yourself and the subsequent choices you make in caring for yourself. Self-discipline brings order and a healthy repetition.  Following are some previous posts that might help with this.  The Fine Art of Self Soothing, Modern Toiletry, Energy Field Surveillance, Sleep Tight, A Right Rest,  Witnessing: Attention, Intention and Healing

"We adore chaos because we love to produce order."  M. C. Escher

Photo credit:  Lalu Danzker

NUTRITION:  Inevitably, we will capitulate to comfort foods; it's winter and there is a crisis. Add some broccoli to your mac and cheese, make some good bone broth for the base of your soups-- very healing, and worth the effort.  Cook.  Cooking and baking and engaging in that way is very important.  It slows us down, it put us in relationship with what we are about to receive, it's caring in action.  Sometimes you gotta get takeout.  Most of the time take the time to cook for yourselves and your loved ones.  Following are some previous posts on this that might help.  On Fire: the State of Chronic Inflammation, pH: It's all about balance, Bone Deep.

"Chaos is a friend of mine."  "I accept chaos, I'm not sure whether it accepts me." -- Bob Dylan

EXERCISE: I bring this up a lot in my work.  Exercise is a major stress buster, helping to regulate our functions and systems.  Being mindful of all movement from washing dishes to just spending time in bed stretching legs and pelvis is bringing an attention to the body. It grounds us, creates a sense of the vertical in myself.  When crisis hits, most of us fly into our emotional and mental responses, leaving our body disconnected.  Our bodies are everything in a crisis; we depend on them for reality checks. Our bodies are constantly giving us cues as to the truth of the moment.  If we aren't attending to the body, we miss the cues of what is going on inside and outside.  Stay close to the body.  Moving the body, the breath in the body opens up our perception; we think more clear, our feelings become regulated. I just said it but I say it again:  the body is everything.  You lose your connection to your body, you lose your groundedness, your sense of reality, and become subject to the craziness your feeling and head gets into without a relationship to your person.  Without your body, you literally lose skin in the game.  The body is an equalizing factor. We discount it, disrespect it, bemoan its inconveniences. We have to love it and we have to move it.  Following are some prior posts centered on this fundamental wellness principle:  Designed to Move

"The battlefield is a scene of constant chaos. The winner will be the one who controls that chaos, both his own and the enemies."-- Napoleon Bonaparte

SPIRIT WORK/PLAY:  

Spirit work are activities that center our being.  Obvious examples are meditation and prayer.  Less obvious examples are walking with an attention to the body ("Zen" walking puts a name on it), Buddhist breathing exercises that open one's heart, and/or dispel negativity. Qigong exercises of bringing in images of patience, magnanimity and letting go images of hate and fear, are among a few.  Spirit work grounds us in our internal truths and helps liberates us from the frantic, over kinetic external.  It is peace-making.  Play is wherever there is fun and humor, satisfaction and that which touches the essential in oneself.  All of these can be found in the "mundane", such as knitting or cooking or car mechanics, or guitar playing to name a few. This kind of work brings us closer to who we are and our purpose, not from the activity itself, but from the internal engagement rooted in love of peace.  When we get a frequent (self discipline!) taste of this, it becomes much harder to lose that vertical, to be pulled out of an inner, more real alignment. Prior posts that elucidate on this:  Humor and Health, Prodigal Return: Community of Self, Oneness: Ho'oponopono, 

Chaos is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence. --Buddha

As separate as these 4 fundamentals might seem, they are actually deeply connected.  They support each other and are often part and parcel of each other's expression.  When they're working together (for the most part), I experience an established discernment.  My mind quiets to the dramatic headline; it starts to look for plausibility, it becomes inqurious, the guile radar engages. My emotional intelligence kicks in without hysteria.  Everything starts to work together.  I'm grounded.  My more whole self is centered.  Thank you self discipline.

Become aware of energy: your own, others and the collective.  Pace yourself.  Step into the fray when your vertical is vibrating "yes".  Be respectful of yourselves and others, others who might not be as equally aligned in a moment.  Practice compassion as best as you can with yourself and others.  Remember:  Kindness.  Be kind, no exceptions (even when your mad as hell).  Kindness, like forgiveness, like love is a boomerang, it comes right back to you.  And hate, fear, ego righteousness-- it does the same thing, it comes back to you almost immediately, toxifying what could be otherwise.  So, for your well being's sake, be kind while you are being courageous.

Following are some essays that might be helpful:

The Collective: Group Energy, Anxiety: Inside the Box, Meditate? Do I Have To, Violence: A Cautionary Truth

The Care of Aging Parents: Making the Last Laps Rich (Part II)

In Part I on this topic, I centered the post around the idea of setting an intention of what we want in the healing and transformation of the relationship with one's aging loved one.  Opening to the feeling aspect of what it is we want prepares the ground for the details, and helps sees us through the challenges of what is put into play—what, hopefully, we and our parents want.  In this Part II, I will deal more with the nuts-and-bolts of how to provide the sustenance that makes these last laps rich and meaningful for you and them.

Once the intention is set, it is good to determine how you and your elder are going to work together.  Are they handing everything over to you, abdicating all control?  Or do they want to be co-determiners as long as possible?  How will this work, how is it imagined?  Part of the healing in the relationship is the sublime relating we do with them, and they with us.  The confronting the hard things in a soft way, the 'yes' and the 'no's. The disagreements, fears, the sensitivity to the taking control and having little say.  It's this territory that is fertile, if not a challenge to navigate.  This is where we attempt to optimize our Listening,  our Attending-to/Attention, our Observing.  This is where breath and a nuanced appreciation for what Is can transform the difficult transitions.

You see your elder aging, having a more difficult time doing basic things, like laundry, cooking and cleaning.  You might even notice a hygiene deficit or important memory lapses (not taking medications in a timely manner, forgetting to pay bills, etc.)  By this time, it's late in the game.  It's late in the game, because of Denial.  Denial on everyone's part.  Experiencing or noticing a decline in a loved one or self is not easily accepted and often minimized.  We want the old homeostasis, even though change is well underway.  We think it's ok for them to be left alone for a few hours, or even though their balance is somewhat shaky, it's ok as long as their cane is nearby.  This lack of acknowledgement of a decline is denial and it is dangerous.  The primary concern we should have is safety.  Are they safe 100% of the day?  They aren't if they're forgetting medications, leaving the kettle on when on the stove or not being hygienic.  Always best to err on safety's side.  Have more coverage, not less.

Decline comes in all gradations;  gradual to quick.  It's important that once it is underway, there are watchful others around regularly to gage needed interventions.  It might start with grocery runs, housekeeping every other week, or help with a weekly shower.  A decline in social engagement outside the home is a subtle marker as well.  This often happens when an elder realizes they are losing memory (uncomfortable conversing with people who know them but whom they don't remember knowing) or have lost a physical fitness that makes it uncomfortable to be more active.  Losing memory can be very subtle and effectively hidden  by vague responses.  Dementia is masked by depression and sometimes vice versa.  He/she that has created an intention to be the 'observer' engaged with the elder becomes responsible for this watching and deciding/co-deciding with the elder when intervention is required.

Every situation is so different. There are myriad ways people can creatively care for loved ones, and also myriad situations in which the caring transpires.  It may be a collective of family members, or a trusted caretaker or group of them who reports to an adult child who is far away.  Determining the elder's wishes (early on, if possible) is helpful in determining what can be set up (home care, elder care in a senior community, etc).  And of course what is physically and financially possible for the adult child.

Early on, it is vital to consider obtaining power of attorney and/or a medical healthcare proxy for your parent.  It is easier for you to manage your parent's finances this way, and there isn't any holdup when it comes to healthcare decisions.  Outside sources that may be of help are your elder's doctor's office (might have referrals to home care agencies, social workers, etc), and local community senior centers which have programs during the day. Also seek information about alternative resources to support your loved one's needs, be they day/night companions, meals on wheels, rides to doctor appointments, groceries, etc.  If your elder is coming from a hospital situation, case managers and hospital social workers are knowledgeable goldmines regarding external resources and medicare/medicaid insurance payment of needed medical supplies; mine them fully.  Visiting Nurse organizations will do a full home assessment to determine level of care required and make suggestions.  Often, Medicare/Medicaid and private insurances pay most of this service.

When deciding on an elder institution (if that is an option you are considering), ask a lot of questions, field them not only to the 'home', but other professionals.  Hospital nurses that deal with the geriatric population often have an interesting perspective.  They see people come in from different places in different conditions, they hear and are aware of the best and worst places.  From institutions, ask for family references.  What are the activities (i.e.,  are residents ever taken off campus?), is there music, art, plant, pet therapies? What is the ratio of care, caregiver to resident?  Is there a "care for the caretaker" program helping with staff burnout? You should be able to get a rating on the establishment from the better business bureau, possibly AARP, etc.  Once an institution is decided upon, it behooves you to form congenial, informed relationships with the staff; they see you frequently, they know your expectations, they are aware of your strong advocacy for your parent.  When things go awry, a steady, calm, rational response is much more powerful than a reaction.   The former elicits respect from staff.  The latter elicits defensiveness and does not bode well for the care of your parent.  This being said, uncharacteristic strong reactions infrequently provided (and merited), are a heads up, pull-up-your-socks reminder to caretakers, which can go a long way to improving care.

For all caretakers, at any level of care, at any point in time, it should be assumed burn-out, compassion fatigue, will develop.  It is a huge undertaking having the welfare of another in your hands.  Being connected to one's breath, finding nourishing quiet moments for oneself helps to soften the hardness, opens one to another type of rest and rejuvenation.  Take care of yourself; make sure those caring for your loved one are also taking care of themselves.  It is through this regular practice where the quandaries, obstacles and difficulties are often relinquished.  Less tension in your body and in your life allow for another understanding, a possible spark of creative genius in solving a problem, an attraction to the thing or person that is needed in a moment.  This is the miracle of this process.  The process of healing a relationship, transforming a life in the middle and at the end.  This is what makes the last laps so rich, even while it is so hard.

Back to Basics

It's probably safe to say, everything (earthly) is grounded in foundational basics.  I am reminded of this as winter continues to challenge human basics like, safety, warmth, shelter;  our time is spent maintaining these basics more ardently unlike other times of the year.

Not to simplify, but if you asked most professionals what is the most important thing about being an expert in their field, many of them would say it is their grasp of the basics in their specific area.  Yes, it is true, professionals have spent numerous creative years evolving their basic knowledge, but it is all grounded in basic understanding.  A basketball coach returns to basics as she increases the skill of her charges, a chess master has the form of the game to return to as he hones his strategy, a farmer knows it is the dirt that matters.  Plants need water and sun, but if the dirt plants grow in isn't renewed and nourished, the plants don't thrive.  Attention to the plants is natural, but attention to how the dirt is fairing is basic to the health of the plant.

And so it is with us.  We are human.  We are supposed to be in flow as pointed out in our several circulation systems (blood, lymph, respiration, cerebral spinal fluids).  Winter or not, flow we must be.  So, getting back to basics for us would be asking questions that we may have gotten distanced from due to weather or lack of sunlight.

Am I hydrated adequately?  Because sweat is not the most obvious occurrence in cold weather, we tend to drink less water in the winter, losing track of fluid intake.  Adequate hydration keeps the various virus' and viral bacteria on the move.  Flushing the system keeps us in flow.

Am I moving enough?  Movement in inertia-prone cold weather, keeps the immune-promoting lymph circulating. It also primes and helps to balance our hormone-producing organs.  It tweaks our pancreas, pineal gland and thyroid.  This is basic for wellness.  Movement supports our winter-waning qi and prana.  Our winter-subdued respirations are woken up and start to flow, activating all the other circulation processes.

What is the quality of my rest?  This probably hinges on one's activity level.  Rest for most 21st century occupants is tied to electronic media or technology.  Gone is the ritual of putting one's feet up in front of a fire and relaxing with a good book.  So, how is your rest?  Do the little-vigilances that we all participate in, let down?  Are they shook up a little bit everyday with deep laughter?  Laughter?  Remember that carefree, releasing action?  Yet another aspect of rest is engaging with spirit.


And finally we come to another basic: nutrition.  Ah, nutrition in winter.... what exactly is that?  The greens available are so uninspiring.  The body craves carbs.  Ugh. Maybe nutrition in winter is about following from the inside out.  What calls me after having tired of endless soups, broths and teas?  Fleshy, golden squash?  Fresh herbs, fragrant and deep in color?  protein-rich mushrooms with their particular dense vibration? an herby-wine poached white fish locally caught?  Potato-garlic mash?  I spend a lot of time being still in the produce section of stores. (I spent about 10 minutes with a bunch of foot long chives the other day, admiring their plump juicy heads, imagining them in a stir fry, or thrown in at the last minute in a fish stew.)  Looking. Watching. Opening.  This is required in winter, unlike the abundant seasons of spring, summer and fall, when the produce is grabbing you with their energy as you try to pass them.  Produce just isn't that spunky in winter.  It travels long distances, and is usually displaced from its normally exotic home.  It's jet-truck lagged?  Been on ice too long?  Sometimes a long opening wait in front of greens is required before you can hear the call.

The qi manifests in glowing embers rather than burning fires.  Ambitions and ego are subdued.  It's a slow time.  Back to basics.

Rest

"Rest is the conversation between what we love to do and how we love to be. Rest is the essence of giving and receiving. Rest is an act of remembering, imaginatively and intellectually but also physiologically and physically."*     --David Whyte

Out of the four stress management principles I advocate in my teaching to others and in my own practice, rest is the most difficult for me (and many of my clients) to grasp. (Maybe we should try NOT grasping...) Not being able to relate to rest must be an American thing.  Or maybe its a 21st century thing.  We have trouble not multi-tasking.  We resist sleep.  We struggle with stopping, not doing.  It might seem we are hard-wired to 'accomplish' or that our worth and value is seated in purposeful activities.


In my post, A Right Rest, I speak about the many varieties of rest that are available to us, that sleep or napping might not always be the right rest we are looking for.  It delights me that only a poet (Whyte) could so eloquently speak about rest being a conversation about loving and being.  It must be our tendencies to leave feeling out of our purposeful driven doing activity and the disinclination (due to discomfort?) to stay far from a closer connection to our being.

"We are rested when we are a living exchange between what lies inside and what lies outside, when we are an intriguing conversation between the potential that lies in our imagination and the possibilities for making that internal image real in the world; we are rested when we let things alone and let ourselves alone, to do what we do best, breathe as the body intended us to breathe."*

Whyte's quote above and in his excellent essay, Rest*, eludes to the play of outer and inner and the ability to let go, to be closer to our more whole selves through the influence of our breath.  Many of our indoctrinations have us resisting quiet or rest because it is a type of death; we have little to externally show for it; and that is unacceptable to the most of ourselves.  In short, we most likely have an attitude distortion about rest: what it looks like, feels like and what it does for us.

"To rest is to give up on the already exhausted will as the prime motivator of endeavor, with its endless outward need to reward itself through established goals. To rest is to give up on worrying and fretting and the sense that there is something wrong with the world unless we are there to put it right; to rest is to fall back literally or figuratively from outer targets and shift the goal not to an inner bulls eye, an imagined state of perfect stillness, but to an inner state of natural exchange."*

*David Whyte, Essay #21 "Rest" 

A Right Rest

For most of us, when the need to rest arises, the first choice taken is to lie down or nap/sleep.  The awareness that other types of reprieve are possible if we follow the availability of the body's call, is often unavailable.  This requires a more nuanced listening.

Rest is required when we have expended considerable energy, negativity has created a leak in my energy channels, or the failure to shift my energy through another type of activity (or too much repetition of even a good thing) can be draining.  Sleep is not often the only or best resolution.  Evolving one's own individual care-taking approach is possible.

There I was, wrapping spring rolls for 60 people, about 100 in all.  It was a lovely task:  the beguiling stretchy rice wraps, fresh vibrating herbs and slivered vegetables in interesting layers, ending with a careful tuck .  It was a small motor hand coordinated, delicate operation-- very pleasing to the senses.  About two hours into the task, it became apparent a gear switch was necessary.  A fatigue came over me, my legs had been in one place for hours, my hands in a small repetitive pattern for same.  I picked up a broom and vigorously started to sweep the floor.  I then mopped it with big wide sweeping arcs, a sort of dance that was fully enjoyable, a static containment getting released.

An entire day of large, challenging movement, considerable perspiration in extreme heat conditions, with a concentrated attention to a myriad of tasks --called me to rest.  I took half an hour, went into an air conditioned room and crawled under a large work table. (A vague recollection of spending a lot of pleasure time under tables as a child came to me.) There, I rested on my back, pulled my knees up, rolled side to side, enjoyed some prone stillness, played with my hands and elbows and provided a rolling touch to mostly unrecognized places like ankles, groin, back of legs near buttocks, sacrum, moving and smoothing (energy?) layers of self.  I followed impulses, some surprising, all of them deeply restful. I finished by rolling out from under the table, picking up a water loaded watercolor brush on the table and ran it across a piece of paper, appreciating its movement and action.  I completed the period by adding  a dot of color at the end.  Sublime satisfaction.

Unexpectedly, I spent most of a morning with someone with a consistently mild thread of sarcasm running through their dialogue.  By the end of the morning I was feeling depleted and fatigued.  Realizing, despite my efforts not to let that particular brand of negativity impact me, I had indeed been influenced.  I took a "bathroom break" and instead went out into the drizzle and energetically walked around the block, feeling the hips, femurs in the sockets, my arms swinging up and wherever they felt like going, the cool heavy precipitation dampening my exposed arms.  It wasn't an easy start; the body was halting and apparently in a stuck rhythm at first.  But before long, attention to the way the movement was unfolding and the almost joyous arm swings had me emitting small yelps of pleasure and the shift was made. I did a few chi (energy) baths at the end for good measure.

The common aspects in these different scenarios is awareness of the need for a change in energy and a willingness to let the body play (a type of rest/release any child would attest).  Rest for the weary can be finding play in the heart, mind and body. The right configuration is limitless, it just depends on following the call to where the awareness is leading you. Fingering a delicate branch of a plant, submerging oneself in water and receiving that new impression.  Lying still or allowing fingers to find their expression through another media or their own manifestation.  Sleep is a delicious mode of respite.  But a rightful, authentic rest can be found in our own nature's beckoning if we listen a little closer and respond.

Unmentionables: Menses

Through history, “that time of month” has been a source of belittlement by others called all sorts of things by all sorts of people (unknowing, fearful, unfamiliar).  It is beguiling that something that often causes discomfort and pain would be a source of mockery and even disgust by others.  I’ve often seen menses in sort of miraculous terms, an incredible cycle that is as reliable as the sun and moon rising and setting everyday, the tides rolling in and out; a reminder to take good care, step back, slow down. Women’s cycles relate us to all of nature’s cycles.  This is a big thing. Even the experienced discomfort, has possibly been something through the ages that has enabled women to develop enormous strength and endurance and a capacity for introspection in the often enforced quietness of “bearing” the symptoms of their physiology.  Though most of us know in broad terms what goes on biologically during the time of a woman’s menses, I hope in this post to shed a little more light on it, to clarify the science of it and hence a better appreciation for this process which makes possible a continuation of human life on this planet, as well as holistic approaches to ease the monthly passage.

Physiology of menses

“That time of month” is a misnomer, as a woman’s cycle is in a continuous hormonal flux.  “PMS” (premenstrual syndrome) connotes the period prior to menses that includes bloating, headaches and irritability.  As in all hormonal fluxuations, temporary mental deficits (ie: memory, distractability) can be prevalent.  As anyone who has experienced the sometime disconcerting symptoms of hormonal flux through their continuum, navigating life, work and school takes self-patience and forbearance.

The endocrine system is the driver in a woman's menstrual cycle.  Ramped up production of estrogen (builds up the uterine wall in preparation for the possibility of a fertilized egg), then lutien hormone and finally progesterone aid in continuing this kind of miraculous cycle women experience every month.  This is a complex interplay of hormones that alternately surge and reduce in preparation of one stage or another in the cycle.  The dominant follicle in the ovary become a corpus luteum if unfertilized; it's primary function is producing large amounts of progesterone. Under the influence of progesterone, the endometrium (uterine lining) changes to prepare for potential implantation of an embryo to establish a pregnancy. If implantation does not occur within approximately two weeks, the corpus luteum will involute, causing sharp drops in levels of both progesterone and estrogen. These hormone drops cause the uterus to shed its lining and the unfertilized egg.  Hence, menses.

Men and women alike are controlled by the endocrine system's hormone play.  It's a kind of fantastically sublime regulator  When things are working right, it is usually very subtle.  Men (and I know you're reading this) who might have difficulty imagining what women experience in their menstrual cycles, can have a better understanding by relating to their experience to the hormone, insulin.  All humans have insulin coursing through their bodies at all times.  The wonderful intact check and balance system most of us enjoy prevents us from noticing the ups and downs significantly.  But with insulin, when we've eaten too little or too many carbs or concentrated sweets, we often can feel our insulin production wildly shift, trying to normalize.  We can get big highs and big lows, irritability, headaches or exhaustion are primary symptoms of insulin not behaving in its usual stealth manner. Men, if you've had this disenchanting experience, welcome to a woman's relationship to the hormones, estrogen and progesterone (primarily) and our nearly constant world spanning over four decades.

What's a girl to do?  No one has control (or even an awareness most of the time) of what their hormones are doing.  But since we do know the discomfort brought on by one's menstrual cycle is hormone-related, supporting one's optimal endocrine function  would be a positive start to reducing the symptoms.  As we know with insulin, if we take care not to make insulin production go into over drive or shut down, we don't get the labile shifts that cause havoc in the body and which in turn causes the suffering.

Attitude.  Susun Weed is the guru of great attitude when it comes to women's health and cycles.  She's "crunchy" (as in granola-girl crunchy), but even if you don't swing that way, her attitude is empowering and positive.  Her little article: Blood mysteries - Susun Weed - herbal medicine - women's health .. is a refreshing boost toward getting a new attitude to our not-to-be-denied function.  Appreciating instead of resenting this incredible process is an act of self love.  Women in general, need a lot more of that right kind of feeling. And it starts with us.

Diet/Nutrition:  Again, Susun Weed has some great advice in Ten Tips for Women with PMS.  Many of her suggestions require self care (like making infusions, taking the time to be mindful of additions you might want to make to food or drink, etc).  This in my mind is a woman's saving grace.  Not only does it instill self awareness and introspection, it actually forces us (unless we want to be fully miserable) to take the time our body is asking us to take and make preparations, consider interventions needed, slow down.  It's kind of great we get these reminders.  It's an aspect of our gender that is extremely valuable.  

Because estrogen increases two weeks prior to the mense date, it might be a good idea to not promote a further elevation of estrogen levels by using soy products or other estrogen-enhancing nutrition at that time.  Also, increasing calcium and magnesium in one's diet decreases unwanted symptoms (Susun mentions this in the above article and emphasizes we should get this through foods not supplements).  Drinking lots of water (abates headaches), (or better yet, infusion teas like stinging nettle-high in calcium, supports the adrenals) helps keep us in flow, the pain, cramps, unwanted symptoms on the move.  Listening to the body's needs is singularly important.  Taking time to listen to what the body is asking for goes a long way to knowing yourself and your cycle symptomology.

Exercise/Movement:  Moving your body regulates your body. Movement primes the cells and system (including endocrine), encourages mutuality and cooperation within the organism.  Most women can tell a huge difference in their menstrual symptoms from the months they have a well integrated exercise regimen and the months they don't.  Exercise improves all circulations within our systems, and is a cornerstone in dealing with daily and/or chronic tension (stress). Moving the body in enjoyment and pleasure is key to sustaining healthy periods.

Practical Rest:  Sometimes our periods hammer us into submission.  Why wait to get layed-low?  Be pre-emptive. Get to bed early when you feel it coming on, take naps when you can, lay down and put your feet up (against the wall feels great). And while you are lying there prostrate, possibly groaning, take some nice deep breaths and send your inhales to where it hurts and imagine their removal on the exhales (out the closest exit sight).  Working with your breath in this way aids circulation, prevents you from minimizing or holding your breath (never a good idea).  It also empowers you to be your own healer.  The weight and heat of a warming hot water bottle on your pelvis is a comfort.  Almost better is sending the living Qi in your hands right to the areas that are hurting while breathing is hugely beneficial.  Never underestimate your own healing energy. You were made for yourself.
 
 resources: 
Red Moon Herbs ~ We create potent herbal products, focusing on ...
 has wonderful combination herbs for PMS and "moon" days.  great products!

some light reading for those heavy days:
Moon Days is a literary, passionate, and profound collection.Twenty-six writers explore the "silent" parts of women's lives; reawakening our memories of embarrassment and shame and transforming them to wonder, excitement, and laughter.

Amazons in Appalachia by Awiakta

RED by Karen Murphy

The Red Tent: A Novel by Anita Diamant (Aug 21, 2007)

 Menstrual facts gleaned from:  Menstrual cycle - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia